Tuesday, January 04, 2011

You don't out-Conservative a Conservative.

It's been a while since I've watched the 5pm politics show on CBC Newsworld... so much so that:
  1. The channel isn't called Newsworld anymore, it's CBC News Network
  2. Don Newman retired and was replaced by the Corporation's jack-of-all-trades, Evan Solomon (aka "the Ralph Benmergui of the 21st Century")
As my headachey self nestled under the duvet on the couch to take in a roundtable discussion between an advisor to Steve Harper, a Liberal MP from St. John's and an NDP MP from Vancouver, I was reminded again why I dislike debating anything with (modern) conservatives:

Often, they are smarmy douches.

A good example of this was when Solomon addressed a question to the three of them about Steve's latest Cabinet shuffle, specifically the appointment of former Global TV news anchor Peter Kent as the new Minister of the Environment.

The Liberal: "Five Ministers of the Environment in the past four years? This shows that the Conservatives really don't care about the environment too much."

The NDPer: "We're the international laughingstock when it comes to the environment. We've become followers instead of leaders."

The Con: "Canadians want the economy to stay the course. We're staying the course. We cut taxes. We stay the course. Oh, and Canadians want us to stay the course."

Way to dodge the question, buddy. Then again, I suppose it's your job to pass off shitburgers as Big Macs, ain't it?

Anyway, the point I was trying to make was that the Conservative hack managed to drag the Liberal MP into a debate about the economy (surprise, surprise; fuck, why do people take the bait so easily?). This prompted the Liberal to proudly tout that, under Paul Martin, they balanced the budget, cut taxes, and so on — essentially, using plays out of the Conservative playbook.

Short response: Don't do that, asshole!

Longer response: Look, if people want someone to cut their taxes and fuck their gov't services up the ass, they're never going to vote for a Liberal anyway. And if you keep shouting from on-high that you're awesome at cutting taxes, your Liberal base is going to start wondering, "Hey, wait a minute, are you a Liberal or a Conservative?" Then they stop voting for you, and you have... uh... wait, how many years has Steve Harper been our fucking Prime Minister, anyway?


Anyway, I hurt. Time for Tylenol and horizontality.
(I must say, the eye-candy on this show is better than it was in Newman's tenure: the foxy Reshmi Nair provides news updates now and again. Oww! Well done, Mothership! I now have a new Basic Cable Crush... first Oga Nwobosi, then Sarika Sehgal, and now the comely Ms. Nair... hmm, I seem to have a thing for women-of-colour telling me information.)

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