Thursday, January 07, 2010

Hot Trend Watch.

HOT TREND #1:
PROROGUING

Have something icky you have to, like, totally deal with but, like, totally don't want to?

Just PROROGUE it! All the cool kids are proroguing these days, like this one below!


Have a math test tomorrow?
"Sorry, Mrs. Stumblebum, I choose to PROROGUE my math test for three months instead of having to deal with it in a responsible way."
COOOOOLLLLL BEEEEEEANSSSS!!!!

Colonoscopy time? Nope, PROROGUING time!
"Doctor Jellyfingers, I think I'm just going to put this off for three months. I sure hope I don't die in the meantime of intestinal cancer like J's grandma did in 1991."
AWESSSSOMMMMMMME!!!!

Turn prisoners over to people you knew would torture them, lie about it, finally fess up, and don't want to face the music in the House? Just PROROGUE it, baby!
"Hi, I'm Stephen Harper. I'm a douche. See you in March, assholes."
CONSERVATIVE PAAAARRRRRTY TIIIME!!!!

So, remember, the hot thing to do this year is to just totally put your shit off until the shit calms down, then everyone will forget about all the shit you did and how shitty it was, and then you get a majority in the House.

I love you, Steve. So does The Economist.

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