There's a very fine line separating "healthy self-awareness" and "problematic self-obsession," and I honestly don't know on which side I am these days.
Things are going kinda "meh" these days: work is rolling along alright, there's nothing new on the romance side of things, and I think my 6-year-old houseplant is dying a slow death. Other that that, not a whole lot else is going on in the Life of J.
In times like these, my mind starts to wander; if idle hands do the Devil's handiwork, then what do idle brains do? The Devil's tax return? (Aside: I wonder if he donates to the Church of Satan, and if he does, does he deduct that from his taxes?)
(Now do you see the degree of idle-ness my brain is running on these days?)
Anyway, when I'm not contemplating the financial wheelings-and-dealings of certain disgraced angels, all I can think about these days is about how I'm in something of a "holding pattern" for a lot of things in my life. Holding for what? I'm not exactly sure.
It was easy a few years ago. I knew exactly for what I was holding; namely, going back to school. Last year, I spent quite a few months getting back into teaching, re-immersing myself in the Daily Grind. But, now what? What's coming down the pipe next?
(Meanwhile, by thinking/typing that, I've probably just doomed myself in some way. I have visions of an asteroid crashing through my roof, or my car getting stolen, or martial law suddenly being declared in Ontario.)
(At least that would liven things up a bit around here.)