From time to time, I come home from work and check my mailbox to find a piece of paper from Canada Post saying that, when they tried to deliver a package to me sometime during the middle of the day, nobody was home. Therefore, I should haul my ass to the local Shoppers Drug Mart sometime "after 1300 tomorrow" to pick up what I paid someone else to send to my place of habitation, so I wouldn't have to leave said place in order to actually acquire the item in question, which I could have easily accomplished given that (a.) I own a car, and in case said car ceases to function, (b.) public transportation passes right by my place of habitation, as I just heard while typing the word "public," I shit you not.
(Oh, #88 South Leaside bus... right on time.)
The problem, of course, is that most people — including myself — WORK DURING THE GODDAMN DAY. That means that, surprise surprise, I ain't gonna be there to pick up whatever crap I ordered off www.penis-embiggener.com when Please Mister Postman comes to my door.
Seriously, I wonder what percentage of people are actually at home at 1:25 on a Tuesday afternoon in late January. It's gotta be in the teens somewhere, if that.
As such, I propose that a significant percentage of service industries — barbershops, Canada Post parcel delivery, clothing stores, the telephone service hotline at www.penis-embiggener.com — open for business at 4:00 pm instead of this 9:00 am horseshit. Open at 4, close around 11 at night; that way, I can actually get to shit before it closes. TD Canada Trust boasts that they're open late now and again... open it up late every night, you overstuffed cash-jockeys! Some of us have shit to do during the daylight hours!
In conclusion, I demand to have my item delivered to me when I am at home. And I demand that my barber be open evenings. (Sorry, Rocco.)