Wednesday, September 27, 2006

You listen here, boy.

Thom Yorke should "go back to writing pop songs," observed Brandon Flowers of the Killers. "He should be grateful that he has the gift to write pop songs, which he needs to write again."

Yes, folks.

Brandon Flowers. Of the Killers.

The Killers.

Here's what that particular flavour-of-the-week looks like:


Yup. The one in the red shirt with the sad look and the makeup. The one who's the frontman of a shitty band that makes shitty music, and has done so for a very short period of time. Somebody told me you had a hit single in 2004, only because corporate radio stations were stupid enough to play that repetitive, mindless drivel over. And over. And over. And over again!

So now you, the definition of Johnny-Come-Lately, decide that it's up to you to tell — ahem — Thom Fucking Yorke what to do? Let me refresh your memory as to what Mr. Yorke looks like.


That's Thom, with the rest of Radiohead, two guitar techs, four roadies, and a guy they have around just to make sure the only colour of M&M's served to the band backstage at shows are robin's-egg blue, which have to be specially-made. But they get made BECAUSE THEY'RE FUCKING RADIOHEAD AND NOT YOU, "BRANDON FLOWERS" OF "THE KILLERS."

Say all you like about AFI, or Fall Out Boy, or any of your other shitty colleagues that overrun the airwaves with your woe-is-me lame-ass guitars. Radiohead are not your brethren. Thom Yorke is brilliant, and you are a mere shitstain.

In conclusion, Thom Yorke will write whatever the fuck music he wants, because he's Thom Yorke.

Now you just go back to playing your little songs, and pouting your little pouts, and making 12-year-old girls' hearts swoon becuase they don't realize your music is wholly inconsequential. And shut the hell up.

4 comments:

Lindsay said...

I miss having a radio show with you so much at this moment.

kelly o! said...

You're certainly Mr. Brightside today. (it had to be done)

JTL said...

Lindsay:

There's a campus of York University just up the street from me. They have an exceedingly-low-powered radio station. I was driving by there last night at about 9:40, and there was DEAD AIR. Can you believe it? I think I might just go in and see if I can get a show on that station again (I co-hosted one in '02-'03 with a buddy of mine).

Kelly:

I hate you. SOOOOO much.

kelly o! said...

= P